Wednesday, March 20, 2013

No Hard Hats Needed


The past few weeks were not easy at all.  Throwing my hands up in the air at many times, praying that Jesus would stop the mayhem in my life, but still walking out the door as if there is not a thing wrong in my world, with my “I’m Fine” sign in hand.

I have a secret, but for many of you who truly know me well, it’s probably no secret at all and you are going to be nodding your head up and down through this post saying “Leah, this is no secret.  We’ve known this about you for forever!”  But regardless, here’s my secret…

I have these walls.  They’re metaphorical walls, not real walls of course, that I seem to have safe harbored around myself.  It’s hard for me to explain elements of my past that have resulted in these walls, but none-the-less they are there.  They keep people from coming in and they hide my insecurities, my fears, my emotions from the outside world.  I’m so used to fixing everything so it looks all neat and pretty on the outside, tie a bow around it and voilà, everything is all better.  And every time I fix something and hide the rest on the inside, my walls get higher and stronger.  Well, this deployment has been painful and beautiful all at the same time, and has given me the opportunity to allow God truly in to chip away at my walls. 

I’ve been thinking about this for weeks now.  I’ve been noticing a change in myself. We’ve been talking about this a lot at church, and I’m certain that my pastor’s sermons are so obviously about me…I just know they are!  I wrote a message to my pastor after church on Sunday letting him know a few of my thoughts and opening up to some insights I’ve been having and I wrote the following to him.

“You know how Joshua had to walk around the city of Jericho all those times for the walls to come down, with the seven times on the last day? Sometimes I wonder how many times God has walked around my walls, that I've put up, to bring them down? I'm so grateful for His mercy and love that He would do that just for me.”

I’m learning and growing and I am having a major demolition party as my walls come tumbling down.  I know I’m not the only one out there with these walls.  I’m not going to lie and say it’s easy to go through this process though.  I’m a stubborn woman stuck in my ways.  I know I will stumble and by instinct my walls will go back up, but they won’t be as strong and will come down much easier.

So join the demolition party folks.  Tear down the walls and get rid of the stuff standing in your way of having that closer relationship with Jesus.  No hard hats needed, just an open heart to what Jesus has in store for us. 

Friday, March 1, 2013

Updates


I deeply apologize for the long intermission between my last blog update and this one.  Life, as one might say, has been a bit crazy.  I’ll give you a shortened version of the latest happenings, and then fill you in on business overseas.


February Basics

·      My grad classes have been very intense this semester.  I’ve somehow been able to keep up, and I have learned so very much, but I’m probably lucky to have any hair left.  Some tasks have literally left me pulling at my hair and screaming at my computer, like creating a website from scratch, no fancy little do-it-yourself in a day website, but we are talking weeks and weeks of work.  (This is hard stuff folks!)  But you better believe I received the one and only 100% in my class.  Oh, yeah!  

·      I feel like I have the most amazing group of 5th graders that I could possibly have this year.  My students put on a Wax Museum project that went off flawlessly.  It was a lot of prep work for all of my teammates and myself, plus of course the students’ hard work, but they were amazing!  

·      I was pleasantly surprised to have a phone call a few weeks ago from Autumn.  She asked to come see us.  We got to have her for an overnight and the girls were ecstatic!  They have missed Autumn terribly, as have I.  I’m praying she will be allowed to visit again for the month of March, as well.  I’m very hopeful.

·      Joanna is all enrolled for kindergarten for next year, and also for kindergarten summer school, too.  She is so excited!  I might be a touch nervous already.  I just can't believe we are there already.

·      Abigail was hit by the flu last week.  She was sick for 6 days straight.  It was a miserable experience for both her and I.  She lost 8 pounds and we are trying to put that weight back on her.  She’s so much better now.

·      We had a little something called SNOW the past two weeks.  A total of 20 inches combined over 2 weeks and 4 snow days later, I’m hoping we are done with it for a while.  Old Man Winter can go hang out somewhere else.



Life Overseas

A big change has occurred for Trent and his squad.  His squad has moved to another area away from the rest of his unit.  There were some police stations that needed to start being worked with that were further away.  Trent’s squad was “volunteered” for this new task.  They got all moved in and settled into their new home yesterday.  The squad is responsible for more police stations now and will have other duties as the need comes.  We ask for prayers for Trent and his squad as they go further into this new chapter of the deployment.  It hasn’t been said yet if they will be there for the remainder of the deployment, or if it is just short lived.  As for packages, the same address still works.  The packages will still get to them all the same.  

 
I’ll try to be more diligent with my postings.  Again, please forgive me for the delay.  Life kind of happened.  : )